Day 8 – nice girls evolve

fire

Husbands, partners and parents of Nice Girls ask yourselves: Will you still love her when she isn’t so “nice”?

Nice as in she agrees with most things, she smiles, she says “I don’t mind” and “It’s okay” a lot, she rarely gets mad and when she does you probably find it funny than serious, and she doesn’t really stay mad. She’s not mean, she’s not pushy, she’s not very critical, she’ll go with the flow.

But maybe one day she’ll get tired of it, tired of being nice. Because being nice sometimes meant she was not heard or that she was not taken seriously. Because being nice, agreeing and following what you like, left her own want and needs unattended. So maybe one day she no longer tries to be nice. She no longer hides all her anger, she says “No”, she becomes more vocal, assertive, adamant. And she asks you to listen. Listen and respond and act, not just to hear and let it out the other ear. Being honest and real with herself and with you becomes more important than being “nice”.

Will you be like “Wow. This is not you. I’ve never seen you like this. This is disturbing. I don’t know how to deal with this new you.”?

Or will you tell yourself: “This is her too. This is very different so this must be serious. I’ve got to really pay attention now.”

And can I ask you husbands, partners and parents, because you are the closest ones, to Let her be. Let her be mad, let her be sad, let her be loud, let her let her feelings out.

Will you still love her when she becomes more of herself? Will you still love her when she grows in mind, strength and confidence? Will you still love her now she doesn’t always seem so “nice”?

3 thoughts on “Day 8 – nice girls evolve

  1. Very interesting topic Rebecca on the subject of the fear of the impact of change. There are so many aspects to this. The concern that the “niceness” is what the other people like about a person – vs. Lots of other aspects – this could be an assumption to be tested. Surprise doesn’t necessarily mean dislike – only different. It could be that inside the other people are testing the boundaries and perhaps like this more open and outspoken version – but being true to oneself is surely more happy in the long run x

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Very wise words indeed, Louise!
      Some of us learned to “be nice” in order to fit in and be generally accepted and liked by people. hence the fear that we won’t be accepted and liked if we stop doing it. Once we realize it, it’s definitely worth challenging this assumption!!

      Like

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